Dream If You Dare To Chase Them

I promised this blog is all about random rambles. I don't know what I am writing here, so excuse me if it is all over the place.

I am 21. Soon to be 22. And often I wonder what have I done in the past 21 years. How much have I accomplished with life. Where am I heading to. Have my actions helped or hindered my dreams. I often wonder this. I question myself over and over and over again.

I had a good childhood, surrounded by friends and family who loved me dearly. But, I don't think I ever fit it. I always remember that feeling of emptiness inside me. That feeling of loneliness even when surrounded by people. I remember it as if it was just yesterday.

Maybe that is why I have always wanted to please other people, keep everyone happy all the time and not be disliked by anyone at all. The idea of someone disliking me would crush me, and I would go to any extent to mend that relation and that view.

I was the school captain for my primary school and deputy captain of both my secondary and higher secondary school. I was selected for the first two and elected for the later. I still remember that day when I was elected by the students of VIHS with almost 75% of the votes to be their deputy captain. I was a boy from a small school in a small island, I knew many a people but did not have many friends then, I was socially awkward and starting a conversation was so difficult I did have to press my fingernails into my palm so hard the pain overcomes that fear. In all three school I tried to cater for everyones needs. Tried to do everything I can that was expected and asked of me. I worked long and hard to live up to the responsibility of the position. I tried my absolute best.

By the end of high school I knew a lot of people. I took every opportunity I got to meet and talk to new people. To learn new things and make new contacts. I went to every workshop, seminar, forum I could and volunteered my time at every rally and event I could. And that was how I got to attend my first international workshop, Training for Trusteeship in Sri Lanka. This was a true learning experience but I still had difficulty talking to strangers and that I think hindered me from getting the full experience.

Youth Leadership Programme was where I overcame most of this fear. Being stuck with 39 strangers for 3 weeks in a small block in a small island will get the best and worst out of everyone. I remember sitting behind a desk facing my back to everyone on the second last day of the programme and crying my eyes out. I did not cry only because I was sad at leaving and letting go off it all, I cried knowing how much I had grown in the past 3 weeks, I cried because I was the first time I could trust and get along with a group of people with such ease.

From then on I never turned back. The London study tour was the next eye opening moment of my life. This was where I learnt the impact one man can have, that dreams do come true to those who dare to dream and that anything is possible if you work hard enough to achieve them. This was also why and how DYM began. Soon after the trip Shaha, Rish, I and a group of other friends established Dhi Youth Movement, she has flourished from a group of friends having fun together to a recognised organisation.

I don't know what I am trying to say here. But, yesterday someone told me that he envies me and wish he could live my simple fun life. I did not get good things served on a silver platter. I was from a simple middle income family and I worked for this, to be where I am today. Honest to God I thought I would end up doing some 9 to 5 job in an office I hate but I never let who I was dictate who I wanted to be. I still have difficulty with people, some might think its my attitude or stubbornness but I work hard every day to excel myself and to fulfil my promise to my country to serve it till the last moment. So don't envy me, I am a nobody, anyone could fill these shoes, work hard and you can achieve miracles. If you believe in yourself and work for the dreams to come true, you can make them come true.